Hi Liz: First of all I want to say thank you for beginning this Ask Liz Blog. It really helps. I hope you will have the time to answer this. Sometimes I feel so alone with my weight problem. I have tried so many times to diet and lose weight and nothing works. I am tired, I am ashamed of my body and I avoid going out especially to the beach, or a fancy party because I don’t want to embarrass my husband with the fat lady on his arm. I eat when I’m happy, I eat when I’m sad and I just eat! It helps for the time being, but not long after that I am hungry again and I eat! Please help! Thank you for offering this forum. I am sorry I can’t afford to pay for you to help. Kaylea M.
Hi Kaylea. First of all thank you for taking the time to Ask Liz. I know exactly how you feel and I can say that with honesty. You are not alone at all. You now have a community to visit and to get help with your challenge. Challenge is all that it is. It is not insurmountable unless, of course, you believe it to be.
First of all, let me suggest that you pay attention to what you are thinking and saying. “I’m ashamed of my body, I might embarrass my husband”. Look above at just a few of your thoughts about your precious self. If you had a close friend would you be saying those things to her/him? What closer friend do you have other than yourself?
I don’t know if you know anything about the Law of Attraction, but to summarize briefly…Like attracts like and no matter how much you want to change the situation, those limiting thoughts lurk in the background and then you attract exactly what you are thinking about.
It isn’t the weight you need to change, it is your thoughts about the weight that is causing you to feel inadequate about yourself. The weight is only a symptom of what is troubling you. Once you release those thoughts about yourself and replace them with soothing, loving thoughts, you will find that the weight and “eating” disappear on their own.
Here is a little exercise for you. Take a page and put a line down the middle; on the left side at the top write – Limiting Beliefs. List all the limiting thoughts and beliefs. Take your time. Really look at these limiting beliefs and ask yourself if they are serving you and are they moving you forward. Now on the right side write Unlimiting Beliefs. These are thoughts that help you to feel a wee bit better.
There is no sense pushing down those limiting beliefs because they will be there no matter what, always ready to pop up when you begin to move forward. It is best to acknowledge them and then find the next best feeling thought. (Just a note), it is very difficult if not impossible to jump from ashamed right up to joy and to maintain that thought, but it is possible to go from ashamed to a better feeling thought like e.g. I do have the power to control my thoughts. Not a great jump, but it is a better feeling thought. You can use “I have the power to control my thoughts”, to think another best feeling thought until you reach joy which is at the top of the ladder.
Will those limiting beliefs pop up again? Of course! You have practiced them for quite some time, but the more you are aware of them and the more you practice a good feeling thought, the less they appear as your better feeling thoughts now become your habit. Hope this helps. For more help, take advantage of my offer – A free Ebook and a free coaching session with me. Take care…keep smiling. Liz
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Till then. Take care…keep smiling. Liz